HEY YOU GUYS!!

Well, we’ve been here in Auckland for a few days now. It really is a busy little city. Well, it’s technically the fourth largest (area, not population) city in the world. I’m not sure how just over a million people take up so much space. Probably because there aren’t that many tall buildings, not like New York or Toronto. It’s a real mix of different cultures. There’s Brits, Kiwis, Maori, Japanese, Chinese, Korean and unfortunately quite a few Germans, sigh.

We had our orientation session yesterday with the organisation that helped us come over, IEP. It was a three-hour chat and to be honest I wasn’t looking forward to it. My worst fear was confirmed when they asked us for our passports to go photocopy our visas and the only other commonwealth passports were two Canadian girls. The rest of the group, apart from a couple from Belgium, were all bloody German. Not too bad I thought, I could always impress them with my knowledge of airport sex shops that I learnt from my very brief time in Munich. It was quite a big group of about 20 or so but my face dropped when the guy taking the session said we all had to stand and go and chat to a complete stranger for the next 5 minutes. Well, most of the Germans talked amongst themselves except for a few single guys who bee lined it straight for the two pretty Canadian girls. I contemplated just pretending I didn’t know Kate and we would then chat about what we were gonna buy for dinner later on but this strange looking German guy came over and introduced himself. Within a nanosecond I had forgotten his name, mainly due to the fact that he looked like Eddie Munster and Gollums love child that had been dropped on his head as a baby! I half expected the first words he said to be “Hey you guys!” or “Sloth love Chunk!” We made small talk for a while before the awkward silences began. I got a little worried as the German circus freak just stood there staring like he was trying to read my aura or detect the very sense of my being! We were rescued before he could suck out my soul by the guy taking the session who told us all to sit back down and he would carry on. Phew.

We watched a few videos glamorising New Zealand but to be fair it wasn’t anything I hadn’t seen before. In fact the only thing of any real interest was how we open a bank account and get our tax number and how to get vehicles checked before you buy them. New Zealand has a weird law where any fines like parking or speeding tickets are attached to the car and not the driver! In theory then, you can buy a car and it has hundreds of pounds of speeding fines on it, which you then become liable for. Stupid law if you ask me. Am tempted to rag the arse of my hire car, get loads of speeding tickets, park upside down on the sidewalk and run over an old granny! Then hand the car back and let the next guy deal with it.

So we spent yesterday afternoon sorting out all the boring stuff like bank accounts then headed down to the harbour for a wee drink. Meaning a small drink, not a drink of wee, by the way. We found a nice little bar on the waterfront and were very pleased to discover it was happy hour. We only intended to stop for one as we had to still sort some stuff out with our English bank accounts that night (UK banks will only transfer money between 9am and 5pm GMT) but ended up getting absolutely twatted!! We staggered back to our apartment and got online to transfer our money. I woke up this morning and suddenly remembered my drunken attempt to transfer thousands of pounds into my new NZ account. Fuck knows where that money will end up! Some little old lady is probably gonna check her account next week and be $10,000 better off! Hopefully it’ll be the granny I run over in my hire car, karma.
No, hopefully it’ll will all be fine but I strongly recommend not trying to transfer shed loads of cash half way around the world after 10 pints of Tui (NZ Lager) and a few Heinekens!!

Dodged a hangover though so not all bad. Decided I would treat myself today. Kate had asked the guitarist in the bar last night (who was very good) where was a good guitar shop in Auckland. So on his recommendation we headed uptown. It was all wet and rainy today and I didn’t have a jacket so ended up buying myself a bright red North face rain coat which was way cheaper than back home. Then we made it up to Music Planet and I sat trying out guitars for the next hour or so and chatting to the English guy in the shop. Was so different from UK guitar shops where there is a sense of smugness from all the guys who work in them. This guy actually sat down with me and jammed! It put me right off! I have only ever played guitar with someone else once and that was years ago. Needless to say I ended up buying a cheapo little black guitar which I was thoroughly impressed with.

We then headed back via Victoria Park market and had a walk along the harbour front looking at all the massive yachts. There was a regatta going on but as it was still raining we just headed back.
I am really loving it here so far. Everyone is really nice and they all speak English, even ze Germans, which is such a welcome relief after a week in Japan. The only thing I have found annoying so far is the pedestrian crossings, which all sound like a spaceship is shooting at you when it’s time to cross. I’m tempted to duck, roll and weave my way across the road commando style shouting “INCOMING!” Any annoyance though is quickly forgotten due to the fact that it’s summer here. Yes it rained today but for the last few days it’s been great again seeing cute girls walking about with next to nothing on. I love summer. Oh, enjoy the snow UK! Ha ha ha (evil cackle).

Still haven’t sorted out a Biff (our campervan). We’ve had a look at some online but until we get our money sorted there’s no real point going to have a look. So have all that to look forward to. We’re hopefully gonna go on a cruise to Waiheke island tomorrow which is not far from Auckland and apparently is beautiful and full of laid back little villages. Should be good, and hopefully miles away from Eddie Munster!

Peace

D

xxxx